Grief Seminar Planned at La Cañada Presbyterian Church

It can result from the most innocuous of events: setting the table for Thanksgiving dinner, getting a postcard from a favorite vacation spot, hearing a particular Christmas carol. Suddenly, a wave of emotion sweeps in, while remembering someone who was lost in recent weeks, or in the past year, or maybe even five years ago.

“Even when we think that we’ve managed the emotions well, and we’re doing well, the holiday season unexpectedly triggers the experience of our grief, and often we are taken by surprise,” said the Rev. Dr. Peter Hintzoglou of La Cañada Presbyterian Church. “The journey of grief is very unpredictable, and the holidays bring about that intensity in ways we have never expected.”

Accordingly, Hintzoglou will convene a three-hour seminar, “Coping with Grief During the Holidays,” on Saturday, November 9, from 9:00 a.m. to noon in the church library (which is just to the left of the Sanctuary entrance). The church is located at 626 Foothill Blvd.

There is no charge for the seminar, and it is open to everyone. “Grief is a human experience. It has nothing to do with our faith, it has to do with our humanity,” Hintzoglou said. “So whether people have a religious tradition or none at all, they will be welcome. The healing of grief comes by virtue of our supporting one another, regardless of any faith orientation.”

Hintzoglou has extensive experience guiding people through these difficult times. He has been the bereavement coordinator at Heartland Hospice for several years and has spent the past decade at LCPC counseling families in the end stages of life and the journey of grief. He also spent more than 40 years as an adjunct professor at Fuller Theological Seminary in Pasadena.

Over that time, he has recognized that this time of year can be particularly difficult for someone who has lost a loved one recently.

“The holidays are a season of tradition for many families,” he said. “Now there is an empty chair at the family table. Now we’re no longer a couple, or the son or daughter who used to come to see us is not there anymore. It’s not just an empty chair, it’s an empty space in the heart.

“How do we enter into a spirit of celebration that our families may experience? We don’t want to pour cold water on the occasion, but we don’t want to deny our feelings. Hence, how to cope with those feelings?”

One important step, Hintzoglou said, is engaging others who are in a similar plight, rather than trying to bottle up feelings and endure it alone. The seminar will provide such company.

“What is the old adage? A grief shared is half the load, a joy shared is double,” he said. “We have been designed to be in community in both our joys and our sorrows. And when we experience a loss and we try to face the sorrow and the sadness and the grief alone, we intensify the depression that is common in such a loss. That depression will manifest itself in unhealthy ways, either physically or emotionally. But when we experience our grief in a supportive group that provides safety and understanding, we are able to work through our grief in a more healthful and constructive manner.”

For additional information about the grief seminar and other programs at La Cañada Presbyterian Church, visit lacanadapc.org or call (818) 790-6708.